Watch 'Off the Cuff': Selena Gomez, Steve Martin and Martin Short talk about their favorite roles, worst auditions and 'Demure Autumn' | Off the Cuff

And we're out. Okay.

Hello, Vogue. I'm Selena Gomez.

And I'm Steve Martin.

And I'm Martin Short.

And this is Off the Cuff.

What a delivery. Thank you.

[Steve] Wow.

Okay, first round, icebreaker.

What was your first impression of me?

My first impression of you?

Before we met? Before we met.

I just thought you were so incredibly talented,

incredibly beautiful, very talented artist.

Thank you very much. [Selena laughs]

[Steve] But – Oh.

I have said this before,

On the way to the first day of shooting I thought:

But she could be a nightmare because she's a pop princess

and she has been a star since childhood.

And then I met you and my heart broke.

I knew immediately that you were a poet.

Wow, that's very sweet. You really are.

Thanks. Not a good poet.

No, no, not a good poet.

And you?

I had heard of Selena Gomez and appreciated

but I didn't really know

so I thought I'd google it.

And then I said:

But first I'll check my credits.

So I look at my credits and they are about this long,

and then I look for Selena's

and it's like page after page after page.

And in fact, she is more professional than both of us.

Oh, I have a question

for Selena. Ooh.

What was the first concert you attended?

That would be Britney Spears.

[Martin] Wow. Oh.

[Martin] How old were you?

I think I was 11.

How about you, Steve?

What was the first concert you attended?

Greek Theater to see Herb Alpert and the Tijuana Brass.

[Martin] Wow. And my friend Nina,

was a dancer in the show.

I whisper to the people next to me:

My girlfriend is a dancer.

Oh, that's so sweet.

Now I have a question.

What is your first stop when you arrive in New York City?

I know the bathroom for you.

And what else?

I just love being on set.

When I'm in New York,

I love making myself comfortable in my apartment and then being on set.

I don't know.

I mean, the first thing I do is

My tradition is to take a big bath with a sponge.

Oh. A what?

Sponge bath. Sponge bath.

Yes.

Are you administering something or getting to know someone?

I meet someone and say:

Do you love sponge washing as much as I do?

[Steve] Yes. Round two.

Okay. Personal questions.

Oh, round two.

All right, guys.

Favorite character you have ever played,

apart from “Only Murders”?

Hmmm.

I raise my hand while you think.

Roxanne. CD Bales.

Oh, oh, that's it.

It was fun playing this character.

It was healthy and happy and had lots of energy.

Had a big nose.

[Selena] Wasn't the dozen cheaper?

Listen, I've played so many characters

and I assume they are all my children.

[Selena and Steve laugh]

So I love them all.

That's not a good answer.

Oh, I must say

that your favorite character is the most extreme,

and the most extreme for me

is the parody of the guy from “The Wizard of Oz” who bounces off the fence.

Dale O’Day.

I've never seen this before. What is it?

I’m Dale O’Day.

[both laugh]

Oh, now I feel left out.

Worst or most memorable audition experience?

Oh.

Well, I auditioned for a commercial

for Tang, the orange drink.

And I went in, and there were eight boys,

and they all looked just like me.

So I had an 8 by 10 and as a joke,

I took a Sharpie and drew a mustache

and a goatee on my 8 by 10.

And then I went into the bathroom

and painted a moustache and a goatee on my face.

And I went in and they just looked at me and said:

Yes, have you read the copy?

I had to leave feeling completely dejected. “Yeah, not really.”

[Selena] Oh, you're thinking, “About that.”

Oh yeah, it was a failure. Didn't get it.

For me it was probably

I don't remember what I auditioned for back then.

but I was red as a tomato because I was so nervous

and I was sweating.

How old?

Probably 21.

[Steve] Oh, oh my God.

It was like a big deal and,

oh, I just, it was- did you get it?

Well, no.

[Selena] Hello, fellow actors. Hello.

Is there a role you would like to play?

Selena?

No, I think there are genres and films that I love,

but I think part of why I love her is

that they have the right people for it.

No, no, there are roles you would be suitable for,

such as Throw Mamma from the Train,

the role of Anne Ramsey, the mother.

Edward, you know, and she's hanging upside down.

I don't know, I think you have reach.

Selena has no idea what you're talking about.

It's the movie- By the way-

Before their time. Neither did America.

Yes yes.

For example, you must update your references every 15 years.

Oh, I have a good one for you guys.

What is the biggest misconception

about being a comedy actor?

Well, it has changed.

You know, when you start becoming a comedian,

You are expected to be funny at all times.

When you walk into a room, you are expected to be funny.

But my act was so extreme that I could not be

people would have hated me if I had been like that.

They still hated you.

Yes, they still hated me.

But I also mean, now,

you know, I feel like we are,

You know, funny on and off screen.

I think the biggest misunderstanding is when people say:

They just come out and do five minutes.

Right.

Five minutes? Yes.

This takes about two months.

And experience and try

and write and throw things away.

Uh, just do it in five minutes. It'll be fine, it's very easy.

Well, I think comedians are interesting combinations

because to make it interesting, it has to be real.

But then you have to figure out what's funny about it.

That's what I think, but the most important thing is to make it a reality.

Round three.

Oh.

I caught Selena.

Oh dear.

Do you have a favorite Mabel look?

from any season of OMITB?

You know, and this is probably

not what people would expect,

but I wore this orange jumpsuit in the first season

when you used the locks to enter.

And I thought it was such a cool look.

It felt very effortless.

For me, your appearance in episode one-

Right. Yes. Absolutely.

Walking down the street is an unforgettable moment.

I mean, you will see that in your,

You know, stories.

This will be the first song by Dua Lipa,

and I love it when a guy says, “Where are you going, girl?”

[Selena laughs]

He said, “Where are you going, looking so tough?”

That's it, that's it. Yes.

[Selena] I have a question. Okay.

For Steve.

What was the most challenging scene to film this season?

This season? That's a trick question

because you never managed one.

Yes. But if you had to choose.

If you say this season,

do you mean season four? What would you say

was the most challenging scene when filming this fourth season?

Well, there is a recording in which you also play,

and that made it doubly difficult,

where we climb on rock ledges.

That's right. Rocky outcrops.

It’s like acting with dinosaurs and green screen,

so you have to pretend that you, you know,

200 feet in the air and yes, that's what I would call it.

I would do that.

What do you enjoy most about the role of Oliver?

I love playing Oliver's narcissism.

[Selena laughs]

I love his attempts to be hip when he calls Steve “Bruh.”

Age.

Nothing is funnier than a 74-year-old trying to be hip.

In order.

It's the lightning round. Oh, I love the lightning round.

I love the blitz round. Oh, it's so much fun.

Okay. Oh dear. Yes.

Brat summer or decent autumn?

Decent autumn.

I would choose the modest autumn.

[Selena] Yes. You don't know-

I don't really know what all this means.

What that means in each case.

Yes, it's okay. I'll teach you later.

[Steve] I choose to be cautious.

I caught Selena.

[Selena] Walk. Left or right?

Ask me that. We'll get to it in a minute.

[Steve] Okay, go ahead. If Selena answers.

[Steve] Okay, go on. Needy.

Right. Left or right?

Right. Left or right?

Right. Wow, that was interesting.

Overdressed or underdressed?

Underdressed. Underdressed.

Voice note or text message?

Voice memo. Well,

but you too, yes. No, I do both,

but I like to hear someone's voice.

Morning or evening?

Tomorrow. Tomorrow.

Night.

Podcasts or audio books?

Podcasts. Podcasts.

New York or LA?

Oh. That's difficult.

This is harder. Hard.

That's really hard. New York, because,

You know, that's where my family and my child go to school.

I've lived here too long. LA.

You have your – I have my family.

There, washing is done with a sponge. That's true.

Yes. What?

I have my family here, in LA.

Yes, yes. That's right.

What do you like to listen to most?

From now on probably …

Can we include our own?

I recently listened to the song Fish Heads.

Do you know the song Fish Heads?

♪ Fish heads, fish heads ♪

♪ Rolly Polly Fishheads ♪

♪ Fish heads, fish heads ♪

♪ Eat them, delicious ♪

[Steve laughs]

Did you- No, the reason

I listened- No, no, no,

but let me ask you something

because I think it answers the question we all have.

Did you have a head injury this morning?

[everyone laughs]

Best time in your life?

And now to me. I would say: now, now.

For me the whole trip.

Favorite time of the year.

Fall.

Christmas.

I would call it that.

We're out of time. Thank you very much.

Sorry, Vogue. We love you.

I don’t care what season it is,

as long as it's 73 degrees.

I feel like I'm learning something new about you

every day and it's, you know, not always the best.

[Steve laughs] No, that's it.

I learned things about Steve that I went

to a hypnotist to try to forget

from my system.

I try not to learn from anyone.

Oh, I know.

Well, thanks, folks, for watching.

That came spontaneously.

And see you next time.

[upbeat jazz music]